The Undead Report is pleased to announce new zombie targets for your shooting, hunting, aiming, target practice and plinking pleasure.
Targets are printed on sturdy 27# stock paper at 13″ by 19″. Targets will be sold in several to a pack, mailed in a sturdy shipping tube.
I’d like your ideas on the current design and what else you may like to see. The limitations of my printing setup are limited to 13″ wide paper, so I’m unable to print standard large targets. Rest assured, the head is life-sized and just asking to be filled with bullets, pellets, darts, paintballs, ninja swords axes, throwing knives, arrows, machetes, sharpened bricks, candy canes licked ’til they’re all pointy or flaming marshamallows.
This announcement is just a teaser, they’ll be ready soon. Post comments on how many you would like to get in a batch, what you’d be willing to pay, that sort of thing.
Update 02/27: Have a look at the new targets in development, coming soon!
Certain weapons are exemplary models of undead destruction. A chainsaw is good. A rifle is better. A rifle with a bayonet can come in handy. A chainsaw bayonet?
Well, it’s not something I’d like to be on the wrong side of. One part electric chainsaw, plus one part tactical rail mount equals twelve parts zombie decapitation. There are distinct benefits to using this weapon attachment – you won’t need a strong body to kill the undead, there is a great morale boost to carrying one of these around, it would be handy for carving particularly thick-skinned venison. As the video below shows, sometimes a zombie head won’t be destroyed by bullets alone.
Date: Sunday, December 14, 2008
Time: 2:30pm – 5:30pm
Location: McCormick Tribune Plaza & Ice Rink Millennium Park
Street: 55 N Michigan Ave, Chicago, IL
I can think of nothing that zombies love to do more than… ice skate… yeah…
Chicago’s Kitty Zombie will be hosting a zombie ice skating party this coming Sunday at Millenium Park. I suggest you go before the Feds start arresting nto only zombie governors but regular zombies as well.
There will be swag, pictures, video, and of course, lots and LOTS of zombies!
Keep in mind this is a PUBLIC rink. Therefore, no dripping/oozing blood, etc. that will dirty up the ice. If we make a mess, we will be asked to leave, and the cops will become involved. Chicago cops HATE YOU and they HATE ZOMBIES.
Make-Up will be provided to those that want it.
Food will be on set for those that love it.
Vegetarian Friendly! Cannibal Friendly!
A Sign-Up for a copy of the DVD once it finished.
If its a cold day, dress warm. There will be an inside to keep warm but the scene is being shot outside so there will be standing around and drinking of hot beverages (also provided!!!!)
I’m counting on a good turn out for this movie to look good. More now than ever do the zombies of Chicago need to assemble for the cause.
If you’ve survived last night, that must mean either A) you don’t live in Flint or Detroit or B) they’re just not burning buildings like they used to anymore.
Zombie Walk
Devil’s Night in Grand Rapids Michigan was a bit more placid than usual. Instead of burning churches like they ususally do, the teeming masses of socially repressed youth and ne’er do-wells rose up against the system by becoming… ZOMBIES.
A world record zombie walk was held last night, with near FOUR THOUSAND zombies shambling about the city. For more information, check out the following articles, and this film clip.
Riverside California, 1994: A sick woman is admitted to the ER, with a highly elevated heart rate, rapidly decreasing blood pressure and incoherent speech. Nurses drawing blood notice manila colored particles in her blood. Then they notice the deathly, checmical and ammonia smell coming from it. Then their faces feel burning, they pass out and wake up in uncontrollable convulsions. The hospital is evacuated, and a fully-suited hazmat team is brought in to manage the strange occurances.