One year left.

Z-Day. 2012. The Mayan zombie super-apocalypse. Sensational journalism. Paranoid survivalists. Gun nuts. People out having fun. Boy scouts taking their preparedness to the next level. If you can be ready for this, you can be ready for anything.

2012 and the end of the world has been discussed at length here (dozens of comments pending) and elsewhere. This site naturally leans towards a zombie apocalypse on the 21st of December, 2012. We’re zombie fans, we love this stuff. Take it with a grain of salt as you will. True,  most apocalypse theories and end time projections lack scientific evidence, but we don’t really care. If we can prepare in a year for a be-all end-all apocalypse of local or global scale based on humans turning into something decidedly less human, you can count on a zombie preparedness expert to get you out of a jam, change a flat tire, whip up delicious scorpion stew, or have a solid sate of mind to hear your own fears. We’re there for you, but we won’t hesitate to end it real quick if you decide to get all bitey on us. Just don’t expect us to share our escape strategies and survival plans with anyone, even our loved ones. They will be revealed when necessary.

Doomsday 2012 will certainly be creeping into mainstream media as the year progresses. You may count on a few groups or individuals even creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. Y2K, Heaven’s Gate, May21, 2011 — the dates have come and gone, and some of us remain. That may be true come a year, but it doesn’t mean our curiosity will be satisfied on the 22nd.

Research indicates it will be the “Boyle” rage virus, still alive human type of zombie. If you’re looking for evidence, all it takes is a few Google searches and Cracked’s RSS feed. Cracked has posted numerous articles about Z-day. Here’s a few relevant ones to bring you up to speed.

5 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Apocalypse Could Actually Happen

• Brain parasites (such as toxoplasma or Naegleria fowleri)
• Neurotoxins (like tetrodotoxin)
• Rage Virus (think advanced rabies)
• Neurogenesis (stem cell research causes post-mortem or post trauma brain growth)
• Nanobots

 7 Scientific Reasons a Zombie Outbreak Would Fail (Quickly)

• Natural predators (dogs, wolves)
• Heat
• Cold
• Biting as a bad poor of transmission
• Inability to heal (which assumes dead zombies)
• Natural landscape barriers
• Weapons and people

And a terse list that fulfills a lot of our carnal desires:

5 Reasons You Secretly Want a Zombie Apocalypse

• Guilt Free Violence
• Free Stuff
• Simplicity
• Acting Like a Jerk
• Being the Alpha Dog

Even if the zombie, climate, political, or economic apocalypse doesn’t happen on the 21st, zombie haters will remain vigilant, stocked, and prepared.

It’s not a paranoia, it’s not a fear, or even a desire. It’s a mindset to think “what if” and “how can I be ready”.

Time to start the countdown.

The Undead Report store is now open! The zombie targets are back, this time as instant download for printing your own zombie targets!

Your purchases help keep this site alive, further zombie research and develop even more targets!

What targets would you like to see? Zombie Santa Claus? Martians? Steampunk zombie? Sound off and let it be known!

PRINTABLE ZOMBIE SHOOTING TARGETS FOR SALE!

Yes, that’s right. The Undead Report’s Zombie Targets are back! Starting Dec 1, you will be able to purchase and download targets and then print as many as you desire to your zombie hating hearts content!

Fresh from range testing, the targets are here once again for ordering and shooting. The targets are now print-at-home, so you’ll be able to print as many as you want for all your bow-hunting, plinking, Nerf battles, paintballing, Airsoft zombie hunting and dart throwing needs!

The targets will be available individually, or you can save and download the three pack! All targets are 8.5″ x 11″ PDFs and specially designed to print in only black ink for ease of printing at home. Targets include areas to mark weapon information, highlighted killzones and more!

Special discount code will be mentioned on launch day on Facebook and in the chat box for my regular members!

It’s time to prepare. We’ve a little over one year left. Let’s get ready.

You may be worried about the apocalypse. If you’re a regular at this site, you’re probably quite familiar with it. On a deep personal level, you may even be scared about it, but dissuade yourself often that such a thing could never happen. Chalk that up to being human and being optimistic. When the apocalypse comes, we may just deny its actually arrived.

Researchers in Europe designed a test for participants to determine how people planned for negative events in the future. It turns out, our optimism may screw up our reasoning, even with statistics of said negative events to aid us.

This human propensity toward optimism is facilitated by the brain’s failure to code errors in estimation when those call for pessimistic updates. This failure results in selective updating, which supports unrealistic optimism that is resistant to change.

Statistically, if you think bad things may happen more often — and plan accordingly — you’ll be better prepared. It’s not far stretched to be advised in your zombie apocalypse planning to engage the possibility of natural disasters, meteors and avalanches at the same time.

Be aware of your own optimism. Right now you may be thinking “ah, but when it does hit the fan, I’ll be surviving with my mates in the Army base the next state over, and we’ll all drink beer and have a laugh”. It’s a good idea, and you’ve taken a few steps towards your survival. Perhaps you’re still a little too happy about the whole thing. This is the apocalypse. Someone has to die. Plan for that eventual bite.

Thanks to Reader Lisa for the tip.

How unrealistic optimism is maintained in the face of reality  via

IO9 : Your brain won’t allow you to believe the apocalypse could actually happen 

Zombies, as well as the cinema fanbases, are split into two kingdoms: The George Romero Zombie and the Danny Boyle Zombie. The Romero Zombie is the reanimated, once alive and now dead walking corpse. The Boyle Zombie is the rage infected, fully alive, maddened and contagious, murderous human being.

While this website may discuss cinema on occasion, it focuses on actual zombies, their creation and destruction. National Geographic in conjunction with several scientists and virologists has studied zombies as well and further backs the Boyle Zombie as a potential holocaust agent.

Rabies is a viral disease that infects the central nervous system and can drive people to be violently mad, according to Samita Andreansky, a virologist at the University of Miami’s Miller School of Medicine. Combine rabies with the ability of a flu virus to spread quickly through the air, and you  have the makings of a zombie apocalypse.

If the genetic code of the rabies virus experiences enough mutations, its incubation time could be reduced dramatically, scientists say. Many viruses have naturally high mutation rates and constantly change as a means of evading or bypassing the defenses of their hosts, however viruses aren’t known to hybridize or change so dramatically in nature. There are various ways viral mutations can occur, such as  through copying mistakes during gene replication or damage from ultraviolet light.

Time to start carrying more antibacterial hand sanitizer.

“Zombie Virus” Possible via Rabies-Flu Hybrid?

If you can be prepared for a zombie apocalypse, you can prepared for almost anything. At least, that’s how the line of thinking goes. If one can have all the food, water, shelter and materials to survive a complete lack of human civilization, one should easily be able to survive a tornado, hurricane or flooding. This is a common thought shared by many zombie fans and survivalists and is our tying thread to reality. Yet when the message comes from the Centers for Disease Control, it’s still a bit creepy.

Considering the Rapture is supposed to happen this Saturday the 21st of May, you’ll need a plan, and you’ll need it quick. Even the Bible fortells of zombies, where people long to die and do not find death, so maybe they’re on to something.

And in those days shall men seek death, and shall not find it; and shall desire to die, and death shall flee from them.

- Revelation 9:6

The CDC warns that with the possibility of a zombie apocalypse, you’ll want your plan to share the common things with any survival plan, but they neglect to mention such important things as a sturdy bladed weapon, firearm, or other suitable projectile weapon.

• Water, one gallon / person / day
• Food, especially non perishable items
• Medications, prescription, painkillers and other OTC
• Tools and Supplies, including knives, duct tape, radios (don’t forget paracord)
• Sanitation supplies, such as bleach soap and towels
• Clothing and bedding (a change of clothes would be welcome in a long term situation, as well as a backpack to carry things)
• Important documents, such as passport, drivers license, (and may I add FOID card if you’re in Illinois)
• First Aid Kits

The Undead Report also recommends:

• Kukri / Sword / Axe
• Pocket Knives
• Staff
• Pistol / Crossbow
• Rifle / Compound Bow
• Bicycle or reliable motorized transit

The warning states that you’ll need a meeting location when the zombies come, as well as an escape route for your home. This is the kind of information that gets filtered out before something terrible happens. CDC claims that they would handle an outbreak of zombism the way they would handle any other outbreak, through study, containment and control.

The post is written by Assistant Surgeon General Ali Khan, whose personal favorite film is the Resident Evil franchise. You know, the one where the zombie virus is created in a laboratory, and then agents are dispatched to deal with it.

That’s reassuring.

According to a Fox News interview about the article, CDC spokesman Dave Daigle said it was a tongue-in-cheek post in response to someone asking CDC officials if zombies would be a concern due to radiation fears surrounding the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant in Japan.

While it’s a good thing that the CDC is trying to get citizens prepared for such a horrendous pandemic, I hope the tongue-in-cheek humor does not apply to their own precautions and preparedness for a zombie outbreak. This is serious stuff and should not be taken so lightly.

Do remain vigilant, do remain prepared, and do take this official government post with a grain of salt. But don’t let your guard down.

From the CDC: Social Media: Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse

Modern architecture for a modern, scary time. Home design taken to extreme, gritty reality and the strictest building codes: making it zombie proof.

The “Safe House” is designed by polish architectural firm KWK promes. It’s a concrete structure with multiple collapsible panels and roll top doors. The courtyard also has a retractable fence.

The structure is a concrete monolith, and its movable components are composed of light steel trusses filled with mineral wool to ensure insulation.  All exterior surfaces are clad with cement-bonded particleboards, then painted with a dark wood stain.

The house is designed with only a retractable second-floor drawbridge as its entry. There are several sliding glass doors at ground level, but these will be secured when the panels are in place. Though a secure drawbridge entry is ideal in keeping out Zeds, one must also have an effective and well guarded exit, or a difficult time will be had leaving out the main entrance.

Several options come to mind: an underground, distant egress, or expanding upon the existing rooftop deck.

http://all-that-is-interesting.com/post/4956385434/the-first-zombie-proof-house

http://www.designboom.com/weblog/cat/9/view/11219/kwk-promes-safe-house.html

As 2010 draws to a close, one thought remains in the back of survivalists minds: “Two More Years”. Whether the solstice of 2010 passes without incident or not, it never hurts to be prepared. The fantastic solstice eclipse this year happened, for a few, two years too soon. Regardless, keep your eyes sharp, your ears pealed and your mind open.

Found in my Christmas stocking this year: one nasty crowbar (with a bright red bow!), and one fully stocked MOLLE compatible first aid kit. Nice. Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like the ability to kill some Zombie Reindeer.

Delivered to a relative of mine: one indestructible Cold Steel Kukri. Click any photo to order!

Here’s hoping your new year, and the one after that, are filled with zero zombies, but plenty of cool decerebrating instruments!

Stay low, keep moving, cheers and Happy New Year!

Santa image courtesy Danny Guy

In my wanderings across the news, horror, feeds and depths of the Internets for all things zombie, there’s one thing I forgot: Tabloids. As Tommy Lee Jones said in MIB, they are the “Best investigative reporting on the planet. But go ahead, read the New York Times if you want. They get lucky sometimes.”

The Weekly World News had this gem:”BRAIN-EATING VACCINES TURN AMERICANS INTO ZOMBIES”

ALBUQUERQUE, NM – The U.S. government is using brain-eating chemicals to turn Americans into Zombies.

The mainstream media and the scientific dictatorship of the United States Federal Government is giving Americans brain-eating vaccines and putting brain-eating chemicals into the water supply. These chemicals, whether ingested by mouth or injected through the skin, virtually rewire minds into a state of subservient compliance so that their natural instinct to rebel against tyranny is neutered. They also make people want to eat more broccoli.

However, as reported a few years ago, brain eating amoeba found in lakes in the American Southwest has been known to slowly kill people with zombie like symptoms.

A similar article can be read here, with talking head video. Brain Eating Vaccine: Alex Jones on Vaccines (Image courtesy this article).

This is fantastic stuff. Whether you follow conspiracies, zombie culture, or have your escape plan ready — stay in the know. Remember, stay low, keep moving, and remember to double tap.

The good, gun totin’ folks  at DPMS Firearms in St. Cloud have produced a fantastic zombie hunting event with various stages, scenarios, tactical situations, reactive targets and more. A prize table includes excellent zombie rifles, lasers, optics, mounts, kits and more!

Edit: www.OutbreakOmega3.com/

DPMS Firearms, LLC and Del-Tone/Luth Gun Club are hosting another “fun shoot” at the Del-Tone/Luth Gun Range in St. Cloud, MN on April 24-25, 2010.

This is one of the largest zombie shoots in the US. This is a “fun” shoot, any and all are invited.  Saturday night includes, a Zombie Hunters Ball, featuring a live band and a pig roast. Staff at the event will be zombified! come as you are, whether it’s a pizza delivery man, ninja, tacticool operator, or office worker. These are real live firearms here, aimed at zombie targets, dummies and the like. This isn’t an HvZ Nerf shoot or a Paintball shoot.

There will be several scenarios to join and shoot at to test your mettle, shotgun skills, rifle skills and reloading abilities.

Up Close and Personal – A nearby farmhouse has been overrun with the undead, but it is full of ammo and supplies, so get a clearin’.

Twinkie Factory – Clear out and hold the Twinkie Factory (Zombieland fans?) and a night’s sleep and Twinkies are your reward.

Live Zombie Open Range – You know what to do. Shoot anything that’s already dead. Rifle/Shotgun/Pistol

Air Drop From Heaven – An air-dropped crate of ACR’s? Retrieve it and then get a shootin’!

Sound The Alarm! – Eliminate all resistance swiftly and sound the alarm. You have 60 seconds to ensure the safety of your fellow survivors!

Anybody Home? – After walking the wilds of Central Minnesota for what seems to be an eternity, your small band of survivors has come across an abandoned house. Guess what? You drew the short straw and you get to make sure it’s clear before you stop for the night. Shotguns.

From the Waters of Lake Luth - These zombies are very active both day and night, straining the senses of the watch crews, and can only be killed with a perfect head shot.   Rifle/Squad shot.

Rule # 32: Enjoy the Little Things – Trap shoot.

Un-Load and Un-Lock - Navigate your way through a series of locks and doors in 60 seconds or the cure is lost!

Zombie Assault Training Site -  These 2 stages have multiple head target and you must wager your skills and life on your training and your shotgun.

The Wooded Valley of Undeath – Guard duty in the forest with your shotgun.

This weekend, St Paul is the place to put your mouth where your money is.