Zombie Parkour: Small Town Illinois Trains Survivors

By Zombie Hunter Sam
Jul
14
2010

Pretty girl zombie hunter

Rule #1: Cardio. If you want to survive the zombie apocalypse, any apocalypse, or just make it to the top of your staircase without getting winded, you need to be in shape. And if the top of that staircase leads to an open rooftop with Zacks on your trail, you’ll need to jump and land with precision. That’s why training, parkour (urban free running) and good health are essential. Your best offense is escape and evasion, and with that, the good people of St Charles, IL are up to speed.

Rich Gatz, is a 28-year-old lawyer who founded Zombiefit in October of 09.  Zombiefit is a fitness program designed to create and enhance physical skills necessary for a world gone mad with slow or fast zombies, bent on destruction and eating the human race.

What if you woke up tomorrow to find your city overridden with zombies, would you survive? This may seem childish, but by preparing for the impossible, you’ll be ready for the improbable.

The keys to surviving Z-day are simple: Be able to lift and throw heavy things, run fast and for long distances, and be able to navigate obstacles and urban environments in an efficient manner.

Are you training? Do you have a plan besides stocking up on guns and barricading yourself in a Wal-Mart? You need to run there in the first place.

Chicago! Zombie fit will come to Grant Park this Saturday July 17th from 11:00 – 12:30! Meet near the Metra station at Van Buren and Michigan.

As rules go, zombie fit has some. Rule number one: Perform functional movements at high intensity. Zombiefit is designed to increase stamina through the training of not only aerobic exercise, but also anaerobic — exercise in short bursts of high intensity, utilizing the body’s stored energy.

Remember, you don’t have to outrun the zombies — just the slowest member of your party.

Zombie Fit

Zombiefit.org

Zombies as exercise motivation – Chicago Tribune

Share Button

Filed Under: Defense · Preparedness · Simulation

14 million infected

  • 1 PurpleEater Jul 14, 2010 at 9:15 pm

    That’s…ironic, to say the least. I just broke my leg yesterday free-running. Don’t practice performance-rolls off of 15-foot walls ;D

  • 2 logan Jul 15, 2010 at 12:46 pm

    Parkour would be a good sport to know, as it is truly “trying to overcome your obstacle”. knowing that in a crowded city (let’s hope a situation like that never happens) would be invaluable. but make sure you’re not carrying a large amount of gear. trying to make your way over a 10 foot wall with a large pack or something isn’t going to be forgiving if you F*ck up :D. but then of course, you shouldn’t go into a city in the first place if you can avoid it, and if you HAVE to, you shouldn’t be carrying too much. Cities= large population. large population= large # of zombies. Large # of zombies= bad bad bad bad bad bad situation. This isn’t Left 4 dead people.

  • 3 Ghosts343 Jul 15, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    lol that sucks purpleEater thats cool u r a free runner… Damn y dont I ever live near anyof these awsome Zombie gatherings lol

  • 4 Logan Jul 16, 2010 at 8:07 am

    @ Ghosts- lol, same here. Nothing ever happens near me (zombie related)

  • 5 PurpleEater Jul 16, 2010 at 2:11 pm

    Lol it is fun…but i hate it when people do all the flips and stuff…the point isn’t to be fancy, its to get from one place to another in the fastest way possible.

  • 6 josho123 Jul 18, 2010 at 8:14 pm

    i think im alright at dat stuff but i need some work put in. heck grab my gsg-5 and im all good

  • 7 Native Jul 19, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Hey!
    Undead Report, where were you at Saturdays Grant Park class?
    I hope you didn’t come and miss us, we waited for a few then went near Lincoln Memorial.
    Maybe try again? Next Saturday, same time same place.
    Keep checking the feed, ZombieFit.org

  • 8 Zombie Hunter Sam Jul 20, 2010 at 11:15 am

    Couldn’t make it last Saturday! Very excited to hear you’ll be back, so will I.

  • 9 M.I.A. Aug 12, 2010 at 12:01 am

    @Logan Free running is when you do all of the flips and other fancy things. Parkour is when you focus on getting from point A to point B as fast as possible. Just thought I’d point that out. :)

  • 10 Logan Aug 14, 2010 at 8:33 am

    Yeah, I know that. Didn’t say anything about flips. I’d ditch free running (look zombie ma no hands) and focus of parkour.

  • 11 luke Aug 30, 2010 at 9:47 pm

    I wouldnt believe it but the bible tells of “the dead walking the earth”…
    and we are in the single digets of bible prophesies that have yet to be fullfilled.

    but it may not be zombies, if the earth really is moving up through dimensions- the change in earths magnetic frequency is being scientifly measured and recorded.. it is becoming faster.. then the dead who walk the earth could be ghosts, and they may take on ‘physical’ form.

    in a theological approach, the zombies we sense could just be those people who are so evil that they nolonger have a soul, yet still walk the earth.

    but thats heavy, to me the whole zombie thing feels like a good humoured global tongue in cheek joke, but despite knowing that, for some reason we still feel compelled to prepare for it – me and my neighbors have a collection of weapons for the zombie apocolypse 8)

  • 12 TwilightDivide Dec 16, 2010 at 7:42 am

    so i was wondering what the best song to play while your fighting zombies. I say “god hates us” by avenged sevenfold. (or buried alive by avenged sevemfold). check them out.

  • 13 robert Feb 27, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    i do parkour/freerunning i guess im a step ahead i practice every day .

  • 14 Oman911 Jun 2, 2012 at 3:00 am

    a fucking sword for lobbing off zomb-tremities and also have avoided homeless people for sanitary and less practical reasons

Leave a Comment